Finding My Spark

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Two years have past since the last post, but I have not been idle on the wandering path. That arts incubator I mentioned? We created a business entity in January of 2020, and by June we had received our nonprofit status from the IRS. SparkNM has a board of directors, a strategic plan, goals for the next year and we have even started raising money! As of this writing, I am in the process of creating a program proposal for the incubator.

Half-way through those two milestones in January and June, however, you may have noticed that I didn’t mention March of 2020. One wonders how much one should speak of that time. We all know what happened. March 13 was arguably the beginning of the lock down in the United States. Due to the COVID-19 pandemic, businesses closed, work stopped, traffic cleared, and we all took a breath on behalf of so many who couldn’t.

National unemployment reached 14.7% between March and April, while in the creative industry, the unemployment rate skyrocketed to 47%. In research done by Michael Seman and Richard Florida on behalf of the Brookings Institute’s Metropolitan Policy Program, the devastation to the industry is thoroughly explored. If you dig into, you’ll notice that they mention New Mexico as particularly hard hit because of the concentration of creative workers here. Needless to say, the time has never been riper for an enterprise that supports the development of capacity among creatives to enter the marketplace in innovative ways. The implications for artists of color were even more significant.

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I started a masters program in May of 2020, from Colorado State University’s LEAP Institute. The Master of Arts Leadership and Cultural Management program has been helping me explore the creative ecosystem from the local to the international levels. I have been studying leadership models, creative industries career management, policy and advocacy, arts event management and community engagement. And this hasn’t been a purely academic exercise. I’ve completed an internship with the City of Albuquerque’s Department of Arts and Culture. I’ve written policy briefs that are now in use. I’ve planned and executed a number of community engagement events, including events involving the refugee population in Albuquerque. And I’ve worked with several partners to launch a youth development program that is serving twenty-one young people, and has spun off to a children’s education program serving two dozen kids in the same neighborhood. We have begun the community development process I mentioned in my previous post, and I love how much we’ve been able to integrate the arts!

I feel like I’ve found my stride. Or should I say, “my Spark“?

Back on Purpose

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In January of 2014 I began an adventure in teaching. For the next five years I learned about classroom management, curriculum development, inquiry-based, arts-integrated instruction and how completely amazing it is to see the lights turn on in a child’s eyes. Teaching is an all-consuming profession. I rarely had time to reflect on my practice, much less write about it on this blog. And I barely began learning how to do it effectively when I realized that I needed to return to my original love, community development.  The profession of teaching, and my mentors and colleagues, have taught me so much about how our system of education works and doesn’t work, and how people learn best.  It was a critical part of my journey.  But apparently, my path has many twists and turns.  I’ve aimed for peaks and been through some valleys, and have now found a meadow to find a bit of respite in while I take my next steps.

Amalia on Purpose is a place to consider the various contexts of an integrated life of service.  Here you will read about what I am learning about my path as I develop capacities for service with my friends in the Training Institute Process. You’ll accompany me on a journey in the development of an arts incubator in the heart of New Mexico.  From time to time, I’ll veer off into the more personal parts of my journey, as I have in the past, reflecting on insights I’ve gained in my struggles.  Ideally, this is a space for sharing, so please share your thoughts and questions.  And ultimately, this will be a place where I can be accountable to myself, and on purpose.  Thank you for joining me on this journey!  I couldn’t do it without you.

Fossil Fuels, Thinking Maps and Life-Cycles: the stuff of inquiry

Today we started to dig into the connections between our planet’s resources and our consumption patterns.  We watched a bit of a documentary called “Earth: The Operator’s Manual”, specifically the part about how fossil fuels are formed. The students created a flow map of the process by watching the clip three times:  once for what materials go into creating fossil fuels; once for how much time is involved; and once to track where the energy comes from and goes to.  They learned that fossil fuels take hundreds of millions of years to form, but we are burning them all up in the course of a few hundred.

We also began to examine the life-cycle of one of their favorite products, especially considering how much energy goes into each step of the cycle.  They want to go to a factory to see how energy is used.  I am so excited I can hardly contain myself!   Now I just need to find a company in the area willing to let 20 5th graders on  their factory floor….

It may be reaching, but tomorrow I am going to help the students understand how governance shifts based on consumption patterns.  Hm.  Writing it out like that makes it seem even more insane, but in a place like New Mexico, the shifts are so easily recognized.  I can resist!

 

New Year, New Beginning

I begin again.  Last year, fresh with the blush of a new teacher, I dove in to teaching and blogging, and hit my head squarely on the side of the pool of:  Too much, too fast.

This year I’m learning something important:  the practice of the reflective teacher.  I have become aware of the term.  I hope to gradually become one.  Right now, I am simply beginning reflective practice.  It is a natural part of the planning process in the IB PYP curriculum model, so it seems natural to do some reflecting publicly, to foster conversation that might help practitioners.  So…without further ado, I begin again.

I am working with my students on an economics unit focused on how consumption patterns influence supply and demand.  We’re looking at favorite product life-cycles, how fossil fuels are formed and used, and how their burning affects our planet.  I want to go deeper, to have them begin to develop their reading skills by digging into real-life texts on the environment, to develop their science skills by looking at local water quality, and make connections to our consumption patterns.  They will develop their math skills by collecting and interpreting measurements, by starting “bogus bucks” bank accounts through which they are “paid” for their work of learning, and from which they must “pay” for their consumption of school resources, plus a bit of business that seems to have spontaneously developed in the form of: “Hey, how many bogus bucks is that packet of bracelet rubber bands worth to you?”.  Apparently, B$150 isn’t too much to some students.  I hope they can pay their “rent”.

This is a bit overwhelming.  I am looking for resources to share, ideas for how to assess understanding, and most of all a sense that I am not insane trying to tie all this together.

Thoughts?  Ideas?  Resources?  Bring `em on.  I’ll share if you will…

 

Dreams of dreams

Last week I spent my writing energy on preparing my portfolio for an application to the Master of Fine Arts Creative Writing Program at the University of New Mexico.  I had been shaken by my reawakened love for teaching.  After years of setting my sights on the writing life, I was distracted by the thought (again) that I need to be “practical.”  Practicality is a good thing.  How had I come back to the idea that pursuing my vision passion and were not practical?

I had gone through many iterations of the argument: I love being in the classroom, and feeling like I could just as well work on a Master’s Degree in Education.  That will undoubtedly require some writing!   Teaching 5th grade pays more than a teaching assistantship. Besides, if I need an MFA I can do it later.

But I felt so sad thinking that “practical” way.  It seemed sensible.  But I kept having dreams that disturbed me.  Romantic interests from my long lost past would appear, and I would give my life to return to them.  Night after night: the one I let go so we could become the good friends we are today; the crush I had at 14, who I thankfully never had so I didn’t need to let go.  I knew these dreams weren’t about romance.  I knew there was a message from my subconscious: Don’t give up your love.  When I connected it to my dream for an MFA everything fell into place.  I can apply.  I don’t know if I will be accepted.  I don’t know if I’ll be offered an assistantship.  And I haven’t even explored the option of continuing to teach 5th grade while I do my coursework.  So I put the application in.  I am not letting my love go.

And goodness knows I gaining a whole lot by learning from my students.  I already have volumes to write about from our time together.  I will share some of those experiences next time.  In the meantime, I’ll just bask in the glow of the knowledge that I haven’t given up on my dream.

Leading with Love

It’s so easy to forget.  We get busy, or lazy or overwhelmed, and we forget to treat every human being as if they mattered.

We made an essential agreement in our classroom.  It focused on two areas: how we treat each other and how we treat our environment.  I had little time to think about or research this exercise, and now I realize we missed a huge, important chunk about how we would approach learning.  Something to consider in next week’s planning.  But I am really glad we spent so much time on those two.  As I mentioned in my earlier post, respect became a hallmark of the discussion, and remains an important touch-point throughout our day.  Love has an important place in the classroom, too.  That is going to be the theme of my week.  Let’s see how it works out…

To shower or to write? That is the question

It’s been a long day.  I need a shower.  I’m exhausted and cranky with my children.  I don’t have much brain power, but I’ve committed to writing here.  So here I am.  And I am here because I have said for years that I am a writer.  Years, I’ve said it.  For many of them I actually wrote daily.  But it’s been months since I’ve written regularly, and I’ve felt the drought.  A big part of my recent employment drama had to do with that, I think.

In my last job, I had nothing to give to the page at the end of the day, no energy, no spirit, no love.  I was really concerned about that because I wanted to start my Masters in Fine Arts next fall, and couldn’t imagine working on it while I had that job.   I began to pray a most potent prayer (the Tablet of Ahmad, for those who are familiar), chanting it in the morning.  The third day I did that, my boss invited me into her office that afternoon and “released me from my employment during my probationary period.”  There had been very little warning, just some counseling to improve the accuracy of the 5% of my work that I did for her.  The rest of my 30 or so colleagues went ballistic because I had become a valuable member of the team.  Why it actually happened is fodder for the gossip mills of some other life.

After I left her office, I went into the bathroom, looked up to the heavens and said, “Really?  This is how You answer me?”

I was stunned.  Confused.  Later I was angry, and depressed.  And less than a week later, my friend asked me (after I told him I had lost my job), “Do you teach?”

It fell into my lap, this job.  Fell from where but the heavens?  And now I sit and write at nearly 10pm, when I have to leave the house before 7am tomorrow with a lesson plan in my hand.  I really need a shower, but I am writing because finally I have a life that demands that I write about it.  I want to say that I had a pretty good day in the classroom today.  I’m teaching my students about fractions and about blogging.  And they are going to blog about learning fractions in the disguise of writing about their experience in a “Spend a $1 Million” exercise which had them converting dollars to decimals to percent and to fractions.  I cannot tell you how amazing it was to see these 5th graders so engaged in learning, so excited about it.  And I cannot NOT write.  David Truss, if you’re out there listening, I want to know that I’m teaching math.  I want you to know I’m writing about it.  And to all of you who have ever encouraged me, either in my writing or my teaching, I thank you from the bottom of my heart.  Because I love it.

I’m going to go take a shower now.  Good night!

Honeymoon phase?

“Bye Ms.  Giebitz!” a student called to me as he walked towards his father’s car.  He had just said, “Ms. Giebitz, you’re the best teacher in the whole world.  You’re as good as…as good as…Mr. XXX [my predecessor]!”

Talk about heaven!  These kids loved their former teacher.  This student was one of his favorites, according to my co-teacher.  I can get no higher praise than that.  He is a teacher with decades of experience who really knows his stuff.

This may be a honeymoon phase.  It made fade over time as we grow accustomed to each other, and I may feel dejected some day.  But today was a good day.

When I taught in China, when my students got “accustomed” to me, if it can be called that, they were still hesitant to engage, to speak their minds, to think for themselves sometimes.  But my students here are like cactus in the desert during a summer rain.  They soak it up and blossom in the most beautiful ways. They engage, lights turn on.

Sometimes they engage and hit a wall.  One student cried on my shoulder when the “Spend $1 Million” exercise proved far more difficult than she intended.  (A group of 4 or 5 students decide how to spend $1 Million together. The exercise helps the students translate between fractions, decimals and percentages, and to articulate their reasoning behind the groups’ decisions.)  The instructions were to only buy four to five really big things (a house, a car, etc.)  Their whiteboard had 10 items on it.  The math had become extremely difficult.  She thought the most important thing was to get it right, and to keep up with the other groups.  I tried to reassure her that she was doing exactly what she needed to do: learn.

I think I’m starting to get the hang of this teaching thing.  I know I’m starting to love it.

Does teaching make me a better mom?

Will teaching make me a better person?  This evening I noticed that I was more patient with my own children.  I don’t seem to loose patience in the classroom, which seems like a bit of a miracle considering how easy it is to loose patience in my home.  I was reflecting on moments in the last few months where I have had to remove myself from the room just to calm down, usually after a long day at my old job.  I was mentally exhausted by work that I didn’t find all that meaningful, though I enjoyed working with my colleagues and believed in our mission.  Perhaps meaningful work is the key.

I’ve been in my classroom for two days now, and I feel like I’m making a difference in those kids’ lives.  I feel like they are beginning to get that there is one more person in the world that really cares about them.  I feel if I make a smidgeon of headway in helping someone  understand fractions or their digital footprint I’ve changed their lives forever.  What a priviledge!

Perhaps spending my day doing that with young people reminds me that my own young ones are also precious, and deserve every bit of loving, patient care that I can give them.  If that is the case I am grateful more than I can say.   I can’t excuse my impatience in the past by blaming it on job stress, but it does help me understand the difference in my after-work attitude at home.  I feel better, even though I am exhausted and a bit overwhelmed by the amount of work there is  just to get ready to walk into a classroom. I hope this is a trend, and that it continues.  Because I like myself just a little bit more at the end of the day, and that ain’t half bad.

Day 1 – Falling Down Tired, and learning R-E-S-P-E-C-T

I came home today and fell into our bed and slept until dinner time.  I am so blessed with a husband who remembers to plug in the slow cooker and makes an awesome sautéed snow peas and garlic!  But what a day…

I greeted my students as they arrived today, introducing myself and asking their names as I shook their hands.  They were all friendly, and I think it set a good tone of respect.  Respect became the theme of the day.

We started out by doing a Learner Profile Reflection.  The students rated themselves as to how they feel they show those qualities.  We then made table tents to help me remember their names.  I had them pass around their table tents to each student.  Each one wrote a positive quality they appreciated in that student from a list they had generated at the end of the last semester.  It took a lot longer then I thought it would because I didn’t have a good method of tracking who had written on whose table tent.  “Plan better” is the lesson.

Later in the morning we focused on creating our Essential Agreement, which I called “2.0” because I am taking over for a teacher who left before the winter break.  The students needed to have the idea that I am a different teacher and a different person reinforced, so we are updating the agreement to be between us.  They identified “respect” as one of the most important things to include as part of “how we treat each other.”  Throughout the day, I found myself asking them “Are we using respect as we listen to Janey?” or saying, “Sam, was what you just said respectful?”  They were so responsive to this!  They immediately took responsibility for showing respect, and changed their behavior.  So maybe it only last for 30 seconds, but they remained responsive throughout the day to that reminder.  I am in awe!  These students are so brave to take on a new teacher and a new environment, and to respond so well.

My main lead-learner lesson for the day was, “PLAN BETTER!”  I had planned for an hour of computer lab time, and didn’t get to the media arts center in time to sign up for the slot I planned.  So…a whole hour, I had to make up on on the spot.  It worked out well, thanks to National Geographic Explorer.  The students had been eager to read the January issue, so we did that instead.  Now I’m somewhat terrified that I don’t have the reading and writing materials I need to plan for the next week yet, so I have to do that in some kind of miraculous way in the 45 minute planning time I’ve got tomorrow, plus make photo copies for the math units we’re working on.

I knew there was a reason I resisted becoming a teacher for all those years.  This is exhausting and difficult!  But, dang… Maybe it sounds cliche, but the kids make it worth it.  They were shocked when I told them they were important to the world.  Some seem already so jaded and disillusioned, so beaten down.  I want them to know I mean it.  I want them to know they are “mines rich in gems of inestimable value.”  If just one of them gets the idea that there’s diamonds inside of them, it’s worth the exhaustion.